Sugar

It's just 3.30, and I already am so sleepy... Blame it on the stupid game last night... Kinda addictive... craps... I need more sleep today... just for today. This morning, before I left for the office, I suddenly remembered the small bottle of energy that I have kept for quite some time - Livita. Whee! That stuff is pretty good... Still can be alert is I want to... but already feel a little bit of headache.. maybe I'm thinking too much about sleep...

Oh, something good happened today! I showed my SV the printout that I could do with VB.Net and he said "The report format is documented, we have to follow the format. If we can't do the same format, then we don't do automatic print."

In my heart, I was celebrating a little. It's so tedious to do a printout with VB.net programs, and some more, want to put into MS Word then print. So yeah... I've finished version 1 of the program! Hehe.. Better start building and populating the database with real data and write a good documentation for the system. This is it! Just about 2 more months, and I'll be back in uni...

Man... the clock really ticks slow.. I want to go home!!

Monsoon

The air in Penang is different today. The air is damp, the clouds hover over the skies, blocking away the sun. I guess this is how Europe is like. Always gray. The air is cool, and extra cold in the office today.

I did something really stupid today. I was working on my project, and I added a new chunk of code that retrieves data from a database, and somehow, I messed up everything. The whole project interface can't be edited anymore in design mode anymore.  (Forgive me for all the technical stuff.. if you don't understand, just think of it as a white board that you can draw things, but now, the white board had been blocked, and you can't change anything anymore) The solution was to start all over again, but well, good thing this happened much earlier before I added a whole lot more functionality to the application.

Well, who to blame? The compiler for not warning me about the warning before compiling and saving, or me who made the mistake? Well, I would choose not to blame myself. :p

Anyway, I have made a copy of the project and I am reminding myself to do it everyday. =) Just incase I do make another mistake like that, I can just revert to the last editing that I made. The most time I would lose will be 1 day instead of losing weeks or months of work!

The rain has been pouring the whole day today. It's such a nice weather to sleep in. I hope tomorrow will be the same. Cool and cloudy, and gray cause that's how I feel at the moment. Well better still, a chilly day in Malaysia~! But I guess when that day comes, the world weather is so seriously messed up~

*   *   *   *

Sometimes I feel that there's no meaning to all that I'm doing. Feel like the things that I do have no substance. No form, no "solid" matter. Anyone felt that way before, or is it just me thinking too much or too little? Pretty messed in the head I think. =S
I need some professional help I think.. xD

OK.. enough crapping.. Should start seeking direction from Father.

Father, grant me Your grace, grant me some strength, breathe into me again.

September

It's September ady... and life seems a little blurry now.. Without my specs la! Can't believe it. I feel better not using my specs but the world becomes blurry. Ny ways, Khai Yi have me a great suggestion.. Use contacts for the time being! hahaha.. I shall go buy it when I reach KL ler. =D

Been quite busy this week, and right now, I'm learning how to program ASP websites! Ain't that cool? hehehe... Dynamic websites... woooo.. Ok.. maybe it's not so WOW for u guys.. but it's cool. Just like the Amazon websites, where nothing is static (maybe a few elements) and the contents change as per demanded!

Yesterday ho, something really funny happened. I came to the office super late, cause Zhia Howe and I decided to sleep in a little bit, but we overslept and woke up really late! When I reached the office, I suddenly remembered that it was the day for the weekly department meeting! And when I reached, they were just wrapping up, and I had to walk to the meeting table ( I think it's more polite to go ler.. rather than just sit at my desk where they can see me anyway). When I reached the table, they asked me what happened? And my mind was still a little fuzzy cause I just got up from bed like 20 minutes ago (I think) I just blurted "Oh, we overslept" After I said that, I was like *oh man.. (hit wall, hit tiang.. hit car.. @_@) * They all laughed.. Aih.. Sangat memalukan rite?

Better start reading some more and look busy! hehe..

Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!

Jubilee year celebration for Malaysia.

I must say I'm proud to be a Malaysian. I'm sure there are some of you out there who think otherwise, and that Malaysia is not good enough, but I feel, Malaysia is indeed a blessed land.

What more can I say? This is where I'm born, I believe that this land is a land of destiny if we are to answer our calls. Amen?

Well, what I did for tonight was:

1. Ate Mc D for dinner
2. DOTA at home
3. Blog (doing now)
4. Pack up ( for tmr la)

Hehe...

Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!

Today ho, Spoke to the girl sitting beside me after what felt like a long time we had this silence between us. Don't know why, but the past few days, ... maybe weeks, we didn't talk. Then today, I just plucked up my courage and offered her some "Wrigley's Eclipse mints" hehe.. So got talk a bit lor.. Feel so weird like sit beside each other but never talk. Lolxx.. The boys school syndrome.. hahaha...

Well, don't know what to do now, maybe I should do more dotaing.. hehe.. Or sleep.. lalala...

Ok ler... better start packing, and sleeping soon.. Leaving early tmr...


Happy Birthday Malaysia!

Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka!

System Error...

How much more "soi" can I be le.. My office computer got virus, then I thought that I could remove it, and things will be fine again.. So I installed a spyware remover cause the virus detected was a spyware, and after I did the removing, it prompted for a restart. So ma restart lo, after restart, Windows loaded properly, but when I login, it straight away logout. Can't even go into Windows.

Well, I learn something new today also; which is how to use the Linux operating system. And I kind of like it. It's not as user friendly as windows is but you definitely can do more things with your PC when you are running a Linux. Well, this might be a start of something new for me. Would like to find out more, and maybe test it out on my own.

I shall go find something to entertain me now while I'm still at home, else tomorrow will be reali bored. Oh ya.. my lecturer is coming over to my company for a visit. Cool eh! I hope everything will turn out well. =D

Rain!

These few days, keep raining.. Today really rain like erm... *let me think of a metaphor* like... *ok.. brain freeze ady...* cats and dogs la. And the cafe was flooded! not with water, but with people, because the whole factory, ( nearly 3000 people) no one went out coz the rain was too heavy.

The rats seem to be super active also today. Running in and out on the overhead pipes and beams. All this while I thought that rentokil has taken acre of them.. but well, they are still running around alive...

Small accomplishments?

It's one of the most wonderful days of the week... FRIDAY..

TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF TGIF

Ya, Thank God for a new day! Today, I've started on a new project, and I'm still preparing the proposal to be sent to my supervisor for approval.

Been reading materials the whole morning, about what the procedure is to inspect the product... Well, going to start writing a proposal and think of how I should proceed with this project.

Hope the weekend will be good..

Back 2

Back again... from lunch! hehe.. Life's great @ Agilent. I get to work, chat, and BLOG! hehe...

Ok.. I don't know what to write now.. Been on this page for hours. Hehe.. It's 3.36 now.. Today got so much things to do, but am really contended and happy with the progress. The project is being implemented well, though very much behind schedule actually. Will have to speed up the process of things.

Better go do my work ler.. Dun have anything I wanna throw into this page now.. Looking forward to Dota later. haha.. :p

~checking out~

Back 1

1 week in KL, lazing around, and doing some house work... even felt like "housewife" at a point. lolz.. coz everday just wake up, cook something for myself, and watch tv! hahah.. Life was reali reali great, and lazing around is great! haha.. Just proves that I'm a lazy bum rite? Lalala...

1 week away from work, and I think I have a lot to catch up on. That being said, what am I doing here blogging? The guys I need to work with have already gone for lunch, so to prevent myself from doing something wrong/ redundant, I shall wait for them. Call me lazy, this is what I think is smart. Hehe.. Don't waste time doing "useless" things. Imagine not waiting for them, and make a mistake that happens in 10 seconds but take 15 hours to fix! No way I'm going to do that rite? I'm just making sure that all I do is productive work. haha.. :p

My tooth is better now... spending so much, it better be good.. MunK, dun scare me weh.. after do still not good? so far, it has been good for me lar.. no ache, so everything is fine, just that I have to go back there a few more times before everything is complete. I hope I won't have to take any more jabs ler.. Feel so tired always after it.

Yesterday while I was on the bus back to Penang, I can't help but think to myself, what am I doing in my life? What is it that I am accomplishing? What happened to the goal of attaining that which lasts forever? I feel that I have lost that goal somehow. Like I'm living for myself, living for something that I know won't last forever. Feel that it will all be a waste, but I don't know how to get things right. Is this just a psychological thing or has the Holy Spirit left me like how God lifted His Spirit from King Saul? Sounds serious rite? Yea, I think so too... Wish I can somehow just go back 10 years, right where I first met Jesus. I might have said this before, but let me say this again. Wished that there was a reset button to life, like System Restore on Windows XP. Beep... everything goes back to the computer's best working state. Hehe...

Aite... Stop here for now.. more to come after this "short" break. Hehehe...

Monday

Today seems to be a gloomy day.. Woke up at 6.15... then snooze n snooze till 6.28... Still felt a little heavy in my head.. didn't feel like getting up at all, but it's MONDAY... so got up... Shower and all and was down at the condominium entrance just when Ben reached. Got into the car, and here I am in office. At 8 am, the engineer came to my table to see if I could find a solution to the problem last week. I just don't understand how come some of the things in here are so not uniform. Like the production line next to each other can have different label requirements... It's kind of frustrating because this side wants so so so much while another side is happy with the system already.

Sometimes, I wish that all I'm doing is just some office paperwork.

Now have to swap PC for people.. huhu... k lar.. got things to do.. atleast now I know that the project is COMPLETE! haha.. I think so lar.. just the setup, and final testing.. Pray to God that everything will be okay. =)

Peon

Sometimes, I feel like a peon.. Work, work and work.. hehe.. But I still do love Agilent. =) Such a nice place to work in. Don't get pressured all the time, and with a little bit of extra effort you are sure to be able to get things done in ways that surpass what the superiors require. (all this is from my experience so far... you might have a different experience la.. haha.. :p ) My work is kinda like I have to depend on other people who don't do what i do to a certain degree. Like for instance, I have to confirm with them which computer are they going to use in the end.. or how do they want the program to look like? What are their requirements?; or this is the best part of what i do...

"ei... erm..where is the computer? Are you busy right now? you seem busy.. oh sorry.. I'll wait till you are done then *walks away trying to look busy with some other thing* " Hehe..

Life is good.. but it gets a little too boring sometimes.. now, my "Supervisor" is not around... He's in the States, so kind of like "slack" off a little.. heheh.. sometimes i 'tertidur' (doze off) at my desk. oh another thing about my desk area is that it is so SUPER COLD!!! Freezing weh... especially when it rains... but strangely enough ho, the lady sitting beside me can sometimes wear sleeveless tops.. walao eh.. no need sweater or something to keep extra warm. I will always have this jacket with me..

Strangely, I'm missing campus. When I was going for internship, I really wanted to just get away from uni, to not be stuck in my room, to go out, do something else.. have a different environment.. but now, sitting here, sometimes when I think of my friends back in campus, I really want to be able to just give a phone call and ask them out for dinner together. Jesse.. miss you lei... miss the times can kacau you and Diane *oops* =x Aih.. Kinda sad at times... Looking at the other side, I have Joel and Jia Howe to always DOTA with everyday after coming back from the office. =)

For now, what I would really love to have is a car. I don't know what is putting this in me but I just feel that my joy will be complete if I have a car now.. hehe. But that shouldn't be right le.. My joy should be complete with Jesus. =) Seems that both also I have to search.. ahah... Since God's word says to seek Him first, and ALL these things will be added unto you. If only God will send me a car tomorrow... hehehe.

Man.. something is not right.. I'm so desperate for a car.. not Father.. Father, can do anything to just turn me around arr? like... duno la.. I also dunno how to help myself ady.. Can like smack my engine or throw in more fire so that I will start burning again? haha.. Like when Elijah called on You to take the sacrifice soaked in water, You sent a fire that consumed all of it, even the waters.. So if my fireplace is wet, send that fire la.. Ignite.. ignite.. ignite...

"Come Holy Spirit, I need more and more of you.
Fill me again with the power of your Spirit.
Lord I'm crying out for more of you. "

Taken from Fall in This Place by Planetshakers - Pick it Up

I think that's all for now ler.. Should I have more coffee? Audrey... make me some of ur special coffee.. hehe.. Have yet to try it.. =)

Grey Clouds

Coming to Penang seemed like a dream come true. I thought that when I come here, I'd have less problems, I'd be more matured in my walk with God, that I'd be able to live a carefree life. When I came to Penang, I moved into a very beautiful condominium in Persiaran Bayan Baru, with a beautiful view from my room, I said to myself, "This is it! My own room with swimming pool view!". Carefree is out the window at the moment, feel that I'm holding on to so many things that I have lost focus. I don't know where to channel all my energy, I want to spend more time with Father, but I just don't have the motivation at times, and just plain lazy at times. Sometimes, I feel like this struggle with my own desires, and what I know should be done is easy as eating a piece of cake, but still, too many a time, I still lose the battle. Strangely, there are times, I can tell myself,

"There are 2 ways you can look at this life, be miserable and sorry for yourself and sit in your own sadness and rot there, or pick yourself up, put on a new suit, and start walking even if it's slower than a crawl, walk..."

No matter what hardships I face, I still have things to thank Father for. His gentleness, patience and grace in dealing with this stubborn, hard, rigid, thick skinned, thick skulled child of His. Though I may choose to turn away from Father, there He stands, extending His arms of love to me. "Father, forgive me for my hard ways, break me if that is what it takes. I have been running around, disobeying You, making my own rules, and worst of all, there are times that I have taken you for granted." I want to thank Father for His grace over my life, showing me His love that melts even the coldest heart, break the hardest walls and brings down all self pride.

I feel bored at work today, nearly over a week, I have nothing much to do, most of the times, I have been waiting, waiting, and waiting.. Waiting for this person to give me feedback, waiting for this to come, waiting for that to come. Sometimes, I just want to go home and sleep. Isn't it better than sitting on my desk doing everything non beneficial? Most of what i do is wait for 11.30 for lunch and then after that wait for 5.20 to walk out of the office gates.

Oh ya, if you guys haven't noticed, I'm also contributing to another blog Caramel Chocolate Swirls. My sister started this blog, and I have been invited to contribute to it. For now, it will be mostly about her wedding. I'm so happy for her, and also happy that she has included me in the preparation for her big and special day. I would try my best in doing the photo slide show.

Guess it's like how Danny put it... "if we look at all the miserable things in life, we will never be happy." if we worry about all the little things in life, we will have no life. Saying that I want to live a life of "carefree" in God is harder than it sounds. I thought that it's so easy to just live without worry, but sometimes, we just can't help it but worry, and think that we know better than God does.

Thursday...

Today is Thrusday! Yesterday was piggy Wednesday! hehe...

Well, I've added something new to my blog again... it's the Cloud Links you see on the sidebar there.. nice rite? =D Thanks to a friend who taught me how to go about it by showing me the link ler.. =) Thanks!

Anyways, today here at work, I'm kinda bored... Got nothing much to do, and I'm thinking of starting the second project earlier, but then again, I have this weekly report to write, so I guess I'll finish up this report first.

If you want to know how internship is like.. well, for me... the first few weeks was super exciting, learning new things, knowing new people, and getting new assignments... that you will work on and it will somehow contribute to producing money or aid in the process of wealth creation.. hehe... Sounds like BIG BIG BIG responsibility rite? Well, it gets boring after week 5... Things begin to be familiar, you will find that work is actually BORING and you just wish that you can break the norm like go and play badminton, or run the track, or just go shopping in IPOH! But noooo.. u cant.. work is work.. 8 hours a day, 40 hours a week, 2 days on the weekends to "chill out" doing nothing basically cause by the time weekend comes, you'd be too lazy to do anything else but sleep.. hahah..

Just pray that yours will be different and super exciting all the way ler.. ehehe... oh ya.. actually ho... Agilent is a very good place to do your internship. You get to learn things, and you also get very little pressure n stress.. ehehe..

By the way, I'm going back to Kuching this September.. Not because it's my bday la... haha. but anyways, u guys can prepare presents for me. hehehe.. Will write in another post...

Officially Bored

Today...

Is a boring day

I don't know what to do, because I've finished what they asked me to do much earlier than what I expected. I suppose this is partly because of our training in UTP that time is always short and project development phases are short, about 1-2 weeks (mostly because of last minute work la... right or not?)

Anyways, I'm glad too that it is a little carefree and I do not have to rush like I'm always doing last minute work. =D


Tonight, my goal is to sleep earlier. Have been sleeping late cause either I'm busy on the phone, or I'm busy online. I also found out that it is not good to speak on the phone for prolonged hours, that it can cause brain damage... *sweat* Still, I don't really believe it because so far, I haven't turned into some mindless zombie because of phone radiation yet.. Imagine if I do turn into a mindless zombie, and started attacking people, what would I do to people? Make them get stuck to the phone? Make them talk non-stop for ever on the phone?? haha... Not so scary ler... aiya... boring... Burned my project on CD already.. hehehe... Tomorrow at 10 am will do a testing at the production Line. Hehe... Hope that everything goes well.

Just now, for lunch, I went out again, to the bank. Not that I have a lot of money to take out, but my ATM card was unusable so i got a new ATM card already. Sadly, they haven't changed the appearance of the card yet. Aih, if it's a different look ma really nice right? hahah... Anyways, I'm just writing whatever comes into my head cause I'm so bored, I don't know what to do. So blog ler..

Tonight, must sleep early, I'm turning slowly into a zombie because of lack of sleep la... haha... not phone ok? Not sure if it's too much computer or lack of sleep, my eyes feel painful and I have a slight headache... or.. is it the phone? Well, if you guys see on the news, about zombies in Penang, do remember me in your prayers. =D

Signing off for now..

A great monday?

Well, today seems to be a good day... My project is sort of finished, notice the sort of? Well, I still am not sure if it will work perfectly under normal operation and I'm not sure if i have made any changes to the program that has made it seem okay, but actually there is a huge bug in it that will cause the whole computer network to crash n burn! :p

Lets hope for the best, and pray that nothing bad will happen when the testing begins.

I want to acknowledge my Father in heaven who helped me out big time on this project. I must admit that without Him, I would not have been able to do it, and He gave me new ideas on how to improve the system and I'm going to propose my idea to the team soon. (After i schedule a meeting with everyone and discuss with them)

Thank u guys who always keep me in prayer. =) God bless.